November 5, 2019

In a trial, a Southern small-town prosecuting attorney called his first witness, a grandmotherly, elderly woman to the stand. He approached her and asked, “Mrs. Jones, do you know me?”

She responded, “Why, yes, I do know you, Mr.  Williams.  I’ve known you since you were a young boy, and frankly, you’ve been a big disappointment to me.  You lie, you cheat on your wife,  you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you’re a big shot when you haven’t the brains to realize you never will amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher.  Yes, I know you.”

The lawyer was stunned! Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room and asked, “Mrs. Jones, do you know the defense attorney?”

She again replied, “Why, yes, I do. I’ve known Mr.  Bradley since he was a youngster, too. He’s lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem.  He can’t build a normal relationship with anyone and his law practice is one of the worst in the entire state; not to mention he cheated on his wife with three different women.  One of them was your wife.  Yes, I know him.”

The defense attorney was left in complete shock and at a loss for words.

The judge pounded his gavel  loudly and ordered both counselors to approach the bench pronto.  And, in a very quiet voice, said, “If either of you asks her if she knows me, I’ll charge you w/contempt of court and throw you in jail so quick you won’t know what hit you!”

About the author 

Nancy Byerly Jones

Nancy Byerly Jones and her husband reside on their mountainside ranch (“Little Hee Haw Farm”) with an energetic “family” of horses, donkeys (large and miniature), dogs and cats. Their favorite pastime is sharing the joy and fun of their animals and ranch life with their family, friends and clients.

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